Catch a Dylan Song or Some Eclipse of the Moon

The year is 1989, and the girl to the right is yours truly. Gastly and funny all at the same time. This would be my very first day of school, at the ripe old age of 4. My Mother thought I was stylish and cute with my big hair, pink dress and black nylons. Most girls like to wear dresses, but I was really uncomfortable. Look at my hair! It was bigger than my damn head. It makes me laugh to look at it, though. Afterall, it'll be a great picture to show my kids one day, and I can listen to them mock me. You know, if I was 20 and dressed that way in 1989 I would have been at the pinacle of fashion. But at 4, I looked silly. Parents...strike that...my mother.

1 month to go til I turn 22! How time flies, doesn't it? Life seems to be whizzing on by and then at times it seems to crawl. I've decided that I can't waste what precious little youth I have left. Who knows? In a few years I could be married, I might have my own children. I need to do more, be more.

Strangely, my stepmom told me something I never thought my parents would say to me. I take my job "very seriously" and "almost too seriously". That never occured to me before. That came up when I talked about how during my vacation (or at least the first bit of it) that it felt weird to not be at work and to sleep in and stay up late how I enjoy. She pointed out that it was the first real vacation I'd had in almost 2 years of working steady hours for either part time or full time work. I'm in the same sort of boat again right now. I'm the only full time announcer, so I've been relugated to working holidays until Mark gets back in February. Right now I have 3 holidays and 3 work days accrewed. With Rememberance Day, Christmas, Boxing Day, New Years...he's going to owe me 2 weeks worth of time off plus two weeks of vactation time. That's not including any overtime between now and then. Yes, that rocks in the sense that I'll get a whole month off in the summer, but working holidays after working 40 hour work weeks without a break (and looking less and less like that raise is coming) I am burning out. I think I'll take some of that time off next month. Dave seems open to that idea.

Feels like so much has been happening in the last few days. Friday I was alone after 1pm, to do logs, commercials, on-air etc. I had work to do but it was a lot of waiting on other people by about 3pm, so I logged onto web-msn to see who was online. Abby was there, so I said hi. Told her I was working, but taking a bit of a break, she was doing much the same. The door buzzer went off not that long after we started talking, and I didn't want someone to leave before I got to the door (because there were tickets to be picked up). I didn't have time to type out a BRB since the buzzer was going crazy. It's annoying when people do that, I heard you the first buzz, don't stand there and press on it 100 times. Anyways, I was out front about 2 minutes, then back to the computer. Abby has left a "gee it's fun talking to myself message" and that irked me. She was taking her sweet time replying to me, but when it comes to replying back, I guess I should be more on the ball. Riiight.

Me: Is something wrong?
Abby: No, why?
Me: Well that was a little rude. I'm at work, that comes first.

This is where she freaks right out (I wish I'd had the forethought to save the conversation) and tells me I'm self-absorbed. Sure, I have my moments, and someday's I'm worse than others, but I think for the most part I'm a pretty caring individual, and I do take a keen interest in my friends and their lives. Afterall, I'd been trying to salvage what was left of that friendship for months to no avail.

Abby accuses me of thinking her medical problems are "excuses". That got my blood boiling. What I find to be an excuse is when I call her up, ask her if she wants to hang out (either go for a drive, watch a movie, go shopping, work on our scrapbook) I get "I'm too tired". Every, single, damn time. I get that her meds make her tired, but what I don't get is "I'm too tired" doesn't apply to hanging out with Lisa, cleaning Lisa's apartment, watching the baby. After talking to her all week and getting the "we'll see how I feel" she tells me she already has plans with Lisa.

That was it for me. I've always maintained that I would never let someone treat me like a doormat, but that's what I'd become. To hang out with Abby at her convience. To have plans made, only to be broken at the last minute. She's done it to me so many times in the last several months that I can't even count them all.

Plus she had to drag Brandy into things. I took time off in August to bring Abby to Bathurst for some medical stuff. The plan was we'd go early, shop a bit, take her to the hospital and then back home. She even called Mindy (a friend of mine from college whom she became friends with while the two lived in Bathurst and didn't know anyone) and set up a lunch date for us all to spend time with eachother. The day before we were to go down, she E-MAILED me saying she didn't want to go shopping and that she wanted to go straight down. She was worried, and thought she might not be able to walk or sit up even afterwards. I understood, and accepted that. I called her to confirm the change, and told her to call Mindy (I didn't have her home #) and let her know. Then she up and changed her mind again, and we would go shopping. So I suggested we really make a girls day of it, and bring Brandy since Craig was off that day. She snarls on the phone that she doesn't want Brandy to come because she "hates" her. WTF? Hates her? She doesn't even know Brandy, save the one time we all hung out. And she had a good time. But because Brandy and I had a fight, she doesn't like her. Talk about childish.

So after the Brandy comment, she said she didn't want to shop at all and she was nervous etc. I told her maybe her step-dad should take her anyways because she didn't think she'd be able to walk, and I can't carry her, let alone up or down the stairs at the two places she lives. She was pissy about that, thinking I said no because of the shopping/Brandy thing. I couldn't have cared less (except her hate of someone she didn't know) about the shopping, I was concerned about Abby not being able to take care of herself, and didn't think I was the right person to look after her.

Friendships end, that happens, that I can deal with. But when people become hostile, that's uncalled for. I think she's a coward for not being able to just tell me things were over. That I could accept, but she had to do it in such a way that would be hurtful. I didn't cry about it, it's not the end of my world. I am the "human sponge" though, and I do have a heart, so I won't lie and say that I came out unscathed.

The whole Keith thing is taking a turn for the worst as well. He's become very distant, and hasn't even left his msn online over the weekend. And his msn is ALWAYS on. Like mine. I just leave it on, so if people want to talk to me, then they can. I wonder if he blocked me or something. I sent him an e-mail but haven't heard back from him. Brandy doesn't figure he'll be coming out to her place for game night anymore. I have to call him in about 20 minutes to tell him to come in and read a funeral announcement in French.

Speaking of Brandy and Craig, gonna head over there after work today. Craig is going to take a look at my car stereo for me and see if he can't get the disc changer to work. The face plate is dead but I'm not going to order a new one until I get the changer working. I can get a replacement head on e-bay for about 10 bucks.

Today is Thanksgiving here in Canada. I had my turkey supper with my grandparents and parents yesterday. Delicious! It was great to spend some time with my parents and check out the work they're doing to the new house. Poor Dad looks all beat up, with a cut on his nose from where some wall boards fell on him. And his fingernail is all black and sore looking from where he was hammering nails up in the corner of the ceiling and he was doing it pretty hard (I guess to hammer it fewer times) and whacked his own fingers. Poor guy almost fell off the stool he was on. My grandparents look well. Teddy (their dog) is off people food cause he was neglecting his own doggy-chow.

My folks are going to visit my sister and her husband Christopher in the states on the 29th of this month. Lilly and Chris are in Washington this weekend because he got invited to an Arms Convention or something of that sort. Army stuff, anyways.

Well...better make a call and do some VTing.

Happy Turkey Day!